Stephen Colbert is shocked, shocked! at Rudy Giuliani’s collusion contusion, and also his crazy eyes

The government shutdown hit Day 27 on Thursday, and The Late Show noted some of the real-world consequences.

One thing President Trump likes about this record government shutdown, though, “is that there’s a chance it might make you forget, for a little while, that there’s this thing called the Russia investigation,” Stephen Colbert said in his monologue. But with the news that former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort was sending internal polling data to a likely Russian agent, “the links to Russia are wrapping around Trump like a boa constrictor around a Florida grandpa.”

So it’s newsworthy — as well as entertaining — that Trump lawyer Rudy Giuliani “basically went on TV and admitted that the Trump campaign colluded with Russia,” Colbert said. “That is so shocking — you saw it — he shocked himself when he heard him say it.” Colbert tried to imitate Giuliani’s crazy eyes, then animated his eyeballs fleeing his head. “Now, that looks bad, but only if we’re going to start counting evidence as proof,” he deadpanned. “Rudy’s comments are just another example of the Trump team moving the goal posts,” sometimes “to a whole different sport: ‘It’s a hole in touchdown, you’re out!'”

Colbert also recapped the crazy story of Michael Cohen paying to rig polls for Trump, and for a vanity Twitter account: “So he paid fake women to say nice things. That’s refreshing — usually he pays real women to say nothing.”

“Remember when Trump said he would run the country like a business?” Jimmy Kimmel asked on Kimmel Live. “Turns out the business was Radio Shack. Trump is desperately trying to pin blame for this shutdown on Democrats. He lashed out this morning, he wrote: ‘The Left has become totally unhinged. They no longer care what …read more

Source:: The Week – Lifestyle

      

Mary Oliver, Pulitzer Prize-winning poet enthralled by nature, dies at 83

Mary Oliver, the beloved and prolific poet whose work reflected her reverence of nature, died Thursday at her home in Florida. She was 83, and the cause of death was lymphoma, according to her literary executor, Bill Reichblum. Oliver made her literary debut in 1963, at age 28, and won the Pulitzer Prize in 1983 for her collection American Primitive, then the National Book Award for poetry in 1992 for New and Selected Poems.

Born and raised in the Cleveland suburb of Maple Heights, Oliver escaped what she called an abusive and “dysfunctional” home life by exploring the nearby woods and writing poetry. She met her partner, Molly Malone Cook, at the New York home of the late poet Edna St. Vincent Millay, whose papers she helped organize after high school. Cook died in 2005.

Oliver’s poems mostly centered on animal life and the natural world. “One of her favorite adjectives was ‘perfect,’ and rarely did she apply it to people,” The Associated Press notes. In her 2004 essay collection Long Life, Oliver wrote that outwardly “there’s never been a day that my friends haven’t been able to say, and at a distance, ‘There’s Oliver, still standing around in the weeds. There she is, still scribbling in her notebook.’ But, at the center: I am shaking; I am flashing like tinsel.”

Oliver’s poem “When Death Comes,” from New and Selected Poems, ends with some thoughts about her own death:

When it’s over, I want to say all my life

I was a bride married to amazement.

I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

When it’s over, I don’t want to wonder

if I have made of my life something particular, and real.

I don’t want to find myself sighing and frightened,

or full of …read more

Source:: The Week – Lifestyle

      

Jimmy Kimmel, Trevor Noah, and Seth Meyers have some fun with Giuliani’s Trump campaign collusion admission

President Trump “appears to be on a collusion course with the law right now, and his alleged lawyer Rudy Giuliani was back on CNN last night and Rudier than ever,” Jimmy Kimmel said on Thursday’s Kimmel Live. If we didn’t have video of his “crazy appearance on Chris Cuomo’s show,” it would “almost be too much to believe.” Giuliani claimed incorrectly that he’d never said there was no collusion between Trump’s campaign and Russia, so either there’s “another Rudy Giuliani out there,” Kimmel said, or Giuliani’s lying — again. “Poor Rudy. Someday he’s going to be in a mental facility telling the nurses that he used to be the mayor of New York and they’ll be like, ‘Uh-huh.'”

Kimmel also had some fun with the story about Trump ordering fixer Michael Cohen to hire a guy to rig some online polls, Cohen paying him a fraction of the cash in a Walmart bag, then hiring him to create a @WomenforCohen account. “I may have underestimated Michael Cohen,” he said. “He might be a lot more hilarious that I ever imagined.”

“It’s crazy that Michael Cohen was rigging polls for Trump while Trump was out there complaining that the polls were rigged,” Trevor Noah said at The Daily Show. “But one place where there’s definitely no collusion is between Rudy Giuliani’s brain and his mouth.” He showed the clip: “Did Giuliani just admit that there was collusion? I think he did, and look at their faces. Like, neither of them can believe what just happened.” Maybe Giuliani’s antics are intentional, Noah mused. “Maybe the master plan is to keep creating so many new scandals that Robert Mueller can never finish his investigation.”

“It really does seem like the pressure of the job is getting to Rudy,” giving …read more

Source:: The Week – Lifestyle

      

Stephen Colbert and Trevor Noah shake their heads at Trump’s Pelosi retaliation move

The 27-day-old government shutdown “is getting ugly, and it was never a beauty queen,” Stephen Colbert said on Thursday’s Late Show. On Wednesday, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) asked President Trump to postpone or scrap his State of the Union address until after the government reopened, citing security concerns, and on Thursday, 45 minutes before Pelosi was supposed to get on a plane to visit NATO allies in Belgium and U.S. troops in Afghanistan, Trump informed her that he was canceling her trip.

“Now, Trump has the power to do this because Pelosi was flying military transport and he’s the commander-in-chief, but Trump did give her another option”: Fly commercial, Colbert said. “I’m sure JetBlue offers daily nonstop flights to a war zone.” And not only did Trump spoil Pelosi’s top-secret trip, he referred to her as “Madame” Speaker, not Madam Speaker, he noted. “A ‘Madame speaker’ is what Trump uses to order at a drive-thru brothel.”

Trump is clearly urging Pelosi to fly commercial “like it’s the worst thing he could think of,” Trevor Noah said at The Daily Show. “That’s hard-core, though, right? Canceling her flight right before she’s about to take off. That’s like the complete opposite of a romantic comedy.” To be fair to Trump, he said, “Nancy Pelosi’s letter was a little bit snarky, right? But it’s crazy that Trump’s GPS never takes him onto the high road.”

Noah dipped into Cardi B’s viral plea to end the shutdown — “How cool would it be if Cardi B somehow ended the shutdown? Like, we find out that Trump is a major fan because ‘Bodak Yellow’ is his favorite song, and also the color of his hair” — and he brought Michael Kosta out to discuss the GoFundMe campaigns of furloughed federal workers and …read more

Source:: The Week – Lifestyle

      

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